I wanted to share this article which spurred some thought for me.
This is the key excerpt:
"I recently heard someone talk about changing our "I shoulds" to "I coulds." That really resonated with me on a personal and professional level, as it seems so easy to get caught in the trap of stressing about everything I "should" do. When we think of things in terms of "I should," we exist in a pressured state of feeling forced to do something. Thinking about what I "could" do shifts us into a mindset of choice—I am deciding in this moment whether to do this thing. It not only sounds different, but it feels different to phrase options from the perspective of "I could" instead of "I should." There is an internal mindset shift that occurs when we do this; and it allows us to move forward with trying to do the things we could, instead of getting stuck in the mode of pressuring ourselves to do what we should."
I saved this article and thought I might use it as a the basis for a post or further thought. The idea resonated, but something didn't seem quite right. I thought, the "shoulds" (moral choices) which are reality based are clearly "coulds" i.e. there's no action that you should do that you couldn't do.
Last week, I was listening to Dr. Ellen Kenner's podcast http://www.drkenner.com/ and she mentioned that people should treat themselves kindly. When they want to change something, they should tell themselves that a certain action is what they "want" to do instead of what they "should" do. It reminded me of the previous article and how much more powerful it is to replace "should" with "want" in our thinking (instead of "could"). The whole focus becomes one of re-inforcing that the choice of actions is based on evaluating the full context and doing what we want to do, all things considered. (http://aynrandlexicon.com/lexicon/context-dropping.html) Not only does this framing of actions skip the common impression of forced action (should), it also skips the maybe aspect of vacillating action (could). There's no doubt that there can be an overwhelming number of choices and many unpleasant times, but it's empowering and self-nurturing to approach the myraid of choices in this way. That's how we can gain a positive focus on life's joys (like I mentioned last week). Parenting and other life choices are about what you want to do considering all the aspects of your life.
together and he was enchanted with describing the whole wizarding world to Daddy who played a good listener by being shocked at all the right times :)
. (He wasn't willing to tell me if he, like Anne, thought "Cordelia" was a perfectly elegant name.) Parenting... a cure for even thinking morning-coffee-time is safe from guffaws!
(I've often heard it referred to as the bible for Sensory Processing Disorder / Sensory Integration Dysfunction. The terminology is not settled.) The tools described are powerful and valuable for any kid. Every kid is learning to integrate their sensory data and will have preferences, often strong ones! When it goes beyond the normal and starts impairing their ability to interact with the world, then this could be the medical label (i.e. time to get a doctor's advice). 
book helped the most with me facilitating his growth there.) He learns from the books and he practices. He can use words, and the right words too, to express his feelings in a controlled, non-attacking manner. He is highly cognitive and wants to discuss every idea, situation extensively. We read and read and read some more. He now spends at least an hour reading to himself in bed each night and comes down with more to discuss each day. So, he doesn't usually say "hi" to people or understand perspective and he often gets too loud/close, but he is intelligent, affectionate, energetic, and, most dear to my heart, passionate about learning! I have no doubt that, if he still wants it, he'll become the airplane engineer that he desires.