This is what I see when I look at my child's desk/work area.
On the floor we have: wallet, iPad, papers from four classes, a chewed kazoo, pencils
On the desk we have: papers from four classes, chewed erasers, broken cables, dishes, trash, pencils
The papers and mayhem cover the "kitchen" table (and a counter out of the frame). This situation is dubbed "fine" by my son.
While I admit to finding that adjective challenging, I hear it a lot. The fact that he struggles to find things in these piles is "fine". The fact that he misses calendar events that are not routine is "fine". His aversion to soap and shampoo is "fine".
I'll keep working to help him figure out the next skill within his reach. His development continues to be so asynchronous that there just isn't an easy answer. But, I just wrote this status update to his educational/therapy team and my conclusion is that he is fine. We'll figure out the next steps together.
Hello team,
Cameron has now completed his sixth semester of dual enrollment at Colorado Preparatory Academy and The Community College of Aurora. He handled the challenge of overlapping compressed-time-frame courses well after that first struggle and has completed the semester with all A’s.
In the middle of the semester I gradually turned over the monitoring of all class feedback to him. In the past, reading and responding to teacher feedback was a challenge; I needed to bring the grades/feedback in each course to his attention and help him picture his response each week. But he did beautifully with that skill this semester! He also responded to a rough Spanish test by independently reaching out to the teacher to learn from the experience (resulting in A’s in the subsequent tests). And, he proceeded to show more work and ace his Calculus final after receiving this feedback from the teacher…"First, when working with AST, the (-1)k is not included as part of the 2 conditions. Then the work you have here isn’t clear how this is less than 1. This does simplify to 1 𝑒𝑒 < 1"
He is on track to graduate in December with both his associate’s degree and high school diploma. Fall 2021 will be the first semester that he takes a full college course load, but the one additional course is unlikely to be a significant challenge. The current challenge is finding the best path to try after December.
Asynchronous development in social/emotional maturity continues to be a challenge. The online platform has offered a valuable buffer for his often immature original-responses to feedback, learning, and conflict. He can vent loudly at the inanimate computer and regain his composure before interacting, but that is not the case in a college dorm or a physical job. His interpersonal skills/maturity are still at roughly the 13-14 year old level. He will turn eighteen shortly before December so he will be facing this new phase as a legal adult and thus the consequences for missteps become much higher. He is also struggling to master the breadth of skills involved in driving independently which modifies the college/work options available. Exploring options will be a key activity over the summer and fall; I’m glad for any suggestions you care to offer.
Outside of school he’s been playing lots of bullet chess online and modifying an already complex board game to become even more labyrinthine!
Thank you so much for all your help,
Rachel
P.S. A fun moment on Mother’s Day...
We were just reading a bit of Shakespeare after dinner and Cameron kept complaining that his study of Spanish was messing with his English. Yet, one word he didn’t pause; he thought he had it. He came across the word “Jove” and blithely proceeded to read “Hoe-vay”!
I couldn’t help picturing Zeus looking down from Mount Olympus with little lightning-bolt-sparks of fury at every mispronunciation-giggle
And
Every time we read about Bertie and Jeeves, I’m now going to be picturing Bertie saying, “By hoe-vay!” Instead of “By jove!” And Jeeves is going to have that pained expression.
We do have a lot of smiles including surprise pictures and… this year’s Mother’s Day sonnet (one of his traditions):
